That Huberok Reports from the Tear Gas Listening Party

I take and be too took; my homies is took, too

Because I live in New York and not The Bay Area, I was at once thrilled and disappointed to be invited to the Tear Gas listening party. I finally get invited to one of those industry things, and I live on the wrong side of the country. Fortunately, I was able to get long-time friend, former contributor on this blog (though he never contributed anything until now), and editor of the criminally under-updated Bots, Bongs, and Baytin', That Huberok - along with his tiny, but sassy girlfriend - to attend the listening party in my stead. Here is his report:

I don’t know what I was expecting at the Tear Gas listening party. Maybe I do. Lots of women and marijuana smoking. In actuality, the ratio of women to men was similar to my own social circle which is roughly 5 dudes to 1 girl. This was fine by me (no homo) as I was attending the exclusive event with my small girlfriend. It became quite clear early on that weed smoking would not be tolerated as apparently The Room is an official “No Weed Zone.” I did find it a little strange that The Jacka would choose to have his party somewhere that apparently despised weed so much, but he is successful and I am not; So, I'm going to assume he knows what he is doing.

As I waited for The Jack to arrive I helped myself to some of the delicious chicken available to me for eating purposes, free of charge. I assumed that free chicken meant free drinks at the bar. Not so. As my small girlfriend and I shared my seven dollar whiskey ginger ale, we waited for the person we were really there for; CELLSKI. With my drink gone and ice between my teeth, I kept my eyes focused on the doorway for my second all time favorite rapper from Randolph Street to arrive. So many questions rushed through my head. Will Cellski come to this? Him and Jacka did a song together on Mr. Predictor 2. Does Cellski have a prior engagement which would make it impossible for him to attend tonight’s function? What did Cellski eat today? Does Cellski like Mr. Predictor as much as I do? Does Cellski ever eat at Tu Lan? If Cellski were a cigarette what kind would he be?

Then it happened. I elbowed my small girlfriend in the side. ”Look,” I said. Big Mafi himself walked down the stairs. Epic. Anyway, I got a picture with him on my disposable camera [Ed Note: He didn't email me the pic, but I found it on his flickr, penny and all].

Shortly after this the actual listening of Tear Gas began. Jacka is a very funny man. After accusing Cellski of having eaten twelve sandwiches that day, he started playing snippets of each song on the album. In between songs he would make fun of his friends. He accused everyone of spending all their money on coke and meth when they should be spending it on his albums. Although I don’t do coke or meth (yet) I might have to cut back on my weed habit a little bit because Tear Gas will be purchased by me, as it is fucking awesome. If you like the Nickatina single (and I do) you will love the rest of the album even more. Because they had to be done my ten we didn’t get to listen to the whole album. Then Jacka spilled a drink in the DJ booth all over a mixer which prompted the bartender to start yelling about how Jacka just ruined his $5,000 mixer and he didn’t care if it was his party. This was the same guy who declared the venue a no weed zone. Jacka, being the gentlemen he is, seemed quite apologetic. What a blast! Do yourself a favor and go by an awesome album free of gimmicks and remind yourself what good Bay Area rap music sounds like.

Tear Gas drops tomorrow. I think I have five copies to give away. So, we will be doing some sort of giveaway here. Stay posted.